Lesson 13 – How to raise your self-esteem and develop self-confidence.

How do you feel about yourself?

That feeling is your self-esteem, the most fundamental and vital attitude in your “Reality” system.

High self-esteem is an almost universal common denominator of excellence – a releasing mechanism that allows your potential to flow easily and freely.

You have developed a pattern of “truth” about your value as a part of your self-image, and you tend to behave in a manner that is consistent with that attitude.

Your self-esteem began to develop in the early years of your life. When you were very small You got a lot of messages and signals from parents and other experts about what kind of person you were.

Some of those signals were very positive and some were very negative. But, here is an important point. It was not just what kind of messages you received but what you did with those messages that counted.

It is what you were thinking and feeling within yourself about yourself that impacted upon you.

Your present level of self-esteem is the cumulative result of the positive and negative thoughts you have been thinking since you were born.

Self-esteem is a matter of degree.

You don’t either have it or not have it. You are somewhere on a scale ranging from the very negative to the very positive – from low to high self-esteem.

Note that self-esteem is not quite the same as self-confidence.

You may have a great deal of confidence in yourself in a particular area or with respect to a particular activity, even though your overall level of self-esteem is low.

Self-confidence is more narrowly focused on a particular skill or type of situation, whereas self-esteem is a deeper feeling that you have about yourself as a person.

If you have a solid base of self-esteem, it is much more likely that you will develop confidence in your ability to handle various skills and circumstances.

If your self-esteem is low, it is important to move up the scale towards a higher self-esteem, a more accurate and more valid and honest appraisal of your real worth, value and significance.

Build some positive affirmations into your self-talk such as, “I like and respect myself.”

Dwell on your successes and not on your failures.

When something goes bad, tell yourself that “next time” it will be better. Tell yourself that “up until now” something has been “this way,” but next time it will be “that way.”

Encourage yourself and encourage others. Become an “encourager” and you will improve your own self-esteem and that of your friends.